General
Each and every moment you have a choice. The choice you make determines the outcome and what comes back to you either positive or negative. Most people are unaware of the importance of their choices and have no idea about cause and effect, or The Law of Attraction.
People that blame others and refuse to take responsibility for what they have in their lives are victims. You can be angry, resentful, frustrated and even furious and feel victimized if you choose, or you can apply the Law of Attraction and take responsibility for what you have created in your life.
The Law of Attraction works for all alike with no exceptions. No one escapes the reactions of their actions. If your finger hurts as you hit it with a hammer, stop hitting your finger!
Here is a list of things that do not work to build a prosperity consciousness, generate wealth or make a person happy loving or loved:
- Complaining
- Criticizing others just to find fault and make you look good
- Cruelty to people or animals
- Anger and hatred
- Greed and miserliness
- Envy and jealousy (the fastest way to create what you don’t want!)
- Gluttony
- Laziness and lack of endeavor
- Talking bad about others just to feel better about your self.
- Waste of money, resources, time or talent
- Arrogance and pride
- Self-centeredness
- A negative attitude (creating what you don’t want)
- Self-pity-I am writing a book on self-pity and really is the number one reason that most people don’t have what they want.
- Lamentation
- Worry (One of my spiritual teachers says, “worry is a prayer for what you don’t want”)
- Self-aggrandizement
- Weakness (become a warrior in your life-there is great strength within you)
- Fear
- Doubt (the biggest dream killer!)
Trust is a difficult word to define and an even more difficult concept to experience. We are told to trust. That is sometimes easier said then done. We get that it is important to do. Trusting yourself first is the key to trust. Trust affects our relationship with ourselves, and how we feel about ourselves. It affects our relationships with others and how we feel about them. And it affects our relationship with the universe and how safe we feel.
So what is trust and how do you do it? Trust is opening your heart, believing in yourself and in the abundance of the universe. It is knowing that the universe is loving, friendly and supports your higher good. Trust is knowing that you are part of the process of creating, and believing in your ability to draw to you want you want.
Trust is a deliberate and delicate balance between hope, belief and reliance. Let’s look at all three aspects:
Hope is an expression of an abundant presence alive with possibility and potential. Hope is when you can look at any circumstance, situation, and person and see the all the potential that is there. It is an important power to work with and the first step in trusting.
Belief is the second aspect and is an attitude based upon an opinion held with conviction. This is very misunderstood. Belief actually precedes experience, not the other way around. In fact, you create a belief, an opinion that you come by that you hold with conviction, and out of that you experience your reality. In other words, we create our experiences based on our beliefs. If you look at your reality closely, and you really took it apart, you will see that the belief came first. Beliefs are not real. Beliefs are not fact; they are only opinions. These are opinions that you hold tight. Beliefs are then reinforced by looking at the current reality, and seeing the evidence of what has manifested. What if you started to believe something different? Believe in something even when the outer world seems to reflect something different. It is easy to feel thin when you are. It is easy to feel rich when you are. Sitting around and believing and hoping is not enough. You must demonstrate trust by listening to your inner guidance and taking action.
The last part of trust is reliance. Reliance is taking action and acting from a foundation of hope and belief. Trust comprised of the three needs action.
Trust is a delicate balance between the three. You are constantly taking action on your unique beliefs and your special quality of hope.
It is Important to understand that it is not about how do I trust myself, others and the universe, but how can I trust better? You know how to trust! But the key is to learn how to do it better. Where are you faulty? Is it your level of hope, belief or the reliance of hope or belief?
You always trust yourself to some degree, you just need to learn how to do it better. When you apply trust where it ought to be applied, regardless if the outcome is positive or negative, you will come away greater sense of trust. When you apply trust where it does not belong, you will come away with no greater sense of trust.
What are the components of trust?:
- Must be a beneficial and/or harmful result that is possible. It could go good or it could go badly. If you were going to get a new job, there is a benefit in attracting a new job, and a harm if you don’t. If you get the new job, you will have the money or the creative expression (the benefit). If you don’t you could worry about money and not be able to pay the bills (the harm).
- The result depends upon the future. If you get a new job or you don’t it affects your future experience.
- The harm must be potentially more harmful then the benefit is beneficial. If you were not to get a new job you could find yourself deeper in debt or starting to go into debt, because you don’t have the money flowing in. That is much more harmful then feeling the creative expression and having the money to actually pay the bills.
- You honestly expect the benefit to occur. (hope, belief, reliance)
All four must be presence in order to apply the issue of trust. If they are present and you have hope, belief, and reliance you will have a greater sense of trust.
It is important to remember that we don’t live in a simple universe. We live in a complex universe, where we are also complex. The idea and concept of trust is not simple. It too is complex. What do I mean by that?
There are many aspects of trusting yourself, another, or the universe. If someone was to say to you, do you trust your partner? That is a big question, because there are so many aspects of your relationship. For example, you may trust that your husband or wife is fantastic with the kids, but maybe they are not good at completing the household chores, or paying the bills. You totally trust that person that your kids will be safe, but that he/she will pay the bills on time, is another story. So to say “I trust my husband/wife” is very general. We need to look at the places we do trust and the places we don’t trust so we can improve that relationship. Maybe you trust that the universe does know what is best for you, but you don’t trust that the universe will actually bring you what you have asked for. To say “I trust the universe” again is a very broad statement and does not serve you in your growth and development. Where do you trust and where don’t you trust?
Here is an example of trusting myself, and what I had to do to increase my trust. I trusted that I was amazing at magnetizing money to myself. I would attract large sums of money, but then spend it even faster then it came in. I would even spend more then I would attract. I would find myself in debt so many times, because of this pattern. So, to say I trusted myself with money, was false. I always felt powerless to money and my financial situation. I trusted the fact I could attract it, but not save it or maintain it. I had to look deeper at the issues in my life and this was one of them. When I clearly saw that I could not trust myself with spending money, I took action to make sure that I changed that. That is the reliance part of the aspects of trust. I started budgeting my money and had someone keep me accountable for that budget. Once I started that process, I could start to see that I could keep my money and I started trusting myself. I then got out of debt easily and effortlessly and starting saving and investing money. I know completely trust myself with money and my financial situation. If I was just to say “Oh, I don’t trust myself with money.” That would leave me feeling powerless and when you feel that, there is not much you can do to change your vibrational set point and therefore your outer circumstances.
So look deeper at the subjects in your life. Examine where you do trust and where don’t you trust. And the places you don’t trust, what can you do to increase that level? Do you need a new sense of hope? Do you need to change or shift a belief? And finally, how can you display reliance by taking action towards that new level of trust?
Trust is the link between the mental world and the physical world. It provides continuity during the time that elapses between conception of an idea and its manifestation. Realize that your dreams are already real on the mental plane; they are just awaiting the perfect time to appear in your physical reality. Trust your higher self to bring you the right things at the right time.
TRUST – To Rely Unto Spirit Totally
I wanted to share this story with you, because it really taught me two things. One, how important it is to have a support system. Two, how important it is to trust.
Do you have people in your life that you can turn to that when you are in your dark days, they can help add light to your life? When you are in a place of not being able to trust and believe that whatever situation you are in will work out, do you have someone you can turn to? I realized how important this was through the decision to sell our home.
Frederic and I decided that because we are expecting another baby, that we needed a bigger home. For those of you that are new to my family, we had built our house a few years ago and it was so perfect for what we needed at that time. With the news of the baby, we decided, to put the house up for sale and purchase another one.
We visited a house and I immediately wanted to make an offer on it. I always go for what I want, and I thought this house would be perfect for us. We needed to sell our house before we could make an offer.
It didn’t take long, and we sold our house. Here is where the lesson comes in. When we sold the house, the move in date for the buyer would be July 15th. With the house we wanted to purchase we could not move in until the middle of August. There was no negotiating on this timeframe. There would be two to four weeks where we would have to be displaced. I was freaking out because I would be weeks away from delivering the baby so I would have no time to set up the house, and also afraid I would not have the energy. I was in catastrophic thinking imagining the worst possible scenarios. I was so scared. I was in total resistance to moving all of our things into storage to have to move it again, all because I am pregnant.
I could not see my future where everything was going to be fine. I was having a difficult time connecting to my joy. I was completely stressed. I called my friend Rebecca (my co-partner for the Goddess Weekend) and she saw a solution where I could not see one. I told her we would need to stay at a hotel for a few weeks, and she helped me see a different perspective. She said, “Cool. You will have a vacation where you don’t have to worry about anything.” That helped me come to terms with that I might have to do this transition.
That helped me relax and it shifted my vibration. I thought, “Okay, if that is the worst thing that can happen, we will be fine.”
Then the house we wanted to buy, fell through. All the other houses on the market were just not what we wanted. I felt even more stress. We both started questioning our decision to sell the house, and there was no turning back, because everything was final.
I then reached out to one of my coaches, Evelyn who gave me a Reiki treatment and told me that she saw the vision of me moving into my dream home. This was really hard for me to see at the time. But, because I had these two wonderful women in my life as my support system (and of course Frederic) I was able to start relaxing and releasing the resistance of moving.
As it always does, it all worked out. Frederic, Alex and I went for breakfast one Sunday morning and on the way back, Frederic suggested we go look at a new housing development. We visited the model house and we loved it. We wanted to build another house, but the timing was not right for us. The realtor mentioned that the model home was for sale and we decided to purchase it. It was exactly what we wanted. The price was right. The timing of the move in date was perfect. It all fell into place.
As much as I trust the universe, and my own ability to create, I was in a very low place energetically. It was because of my support system that I reached out to that I was able to get out of that negative vibration and see beyond my own “stuff”. Had I stayed stuck in that negative vibration, I most likely would not have been able to attract our dream home. I did my work and all fell into place.
So why is it so hard to trust when we are in our dark spots? It feels as if we get in a whirlpool and we are sinking in the darkness with no possible way out. Law of Attraction at its best: the worse it gets, the worse it gets. The better it gets, the better it gets. So it is up to us to stop the energetic vibration we are on and deliberately change into a different vibration. That is why a support system is so important.
Why do we feel that we have to do it ourselves, when there really is a big amazing universe that wants to support us and bring us all good things? I suggest that you attract people in your life that you can turn to when you can’t see beyond the current situation. It always helps to get a fresh and different perspective. I am so grateful that I attracted this support system, because it helped me shift my vibration. That is why coaching is so important. If you don’t have that in your life, a coach can provide that change in perspective for you.
Next month I will discuss trust and how we can go about trusting ourselves, others and the universe. Stay tuned!
What do you allow to take you away from your power?
You know each one of us is connected to our well-being and joy. We all have access to that power and connection to God/Goddess/All-That-Is. I know for myself, when I am in alignment with that higher me, I am so happy and joyful. Things manifest in my life with ease and elegance. I am so free and my days just flow beautifully.
But there are things that have the potential of taking me away from that empowered and joyful space. Sometimes I allow people, or a mindset, or even a circumstance, take me away from that joy. But ultimately it is up to me to allow or disallow my power. It is up to me to decided, and determine where I am giving my power away.
So what allows you to be taken from your power? Is it your work? Do you go to work feeling happy and then one encounter with a co-worker or your boss knocks you off? Or maybe you are looking for work, and can’t seem to find the job you are looking for? Maybe it is your relationship with money? You feel fine and then an unexpected bill comes in?
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What about the people in your life? Do you come home from a good day of work and then your partner comes home and you find yourself in a crabby mood? Or maybe it is your children, parents, or even the in-laws? (Don’t you sometimes wish they could give you a warning ahead of time?) |
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Is it your friends? Are they not behaving in the way you want them to? In all of these situations or circumstances, we have the power to choose. We can either be taken off course by giving our attention to what others are doing, and therefore lose our own footing, or we can continue to choose to be empowered regardless of what is happening in our lives. |
How?
There are two powerful processes that I use all the time in my own life. First, find your connection to your well-being. I usually do this by meditating, or just taking time to connect with the feeling of joy. It is always there and available to us regardless of what is going on outside of us. If you have ever felt joy before, that emotion is always available to you. Connect with that joy and then imagine the person, circumstance or energy in front of you. Practice staying neutral to this “thing” that takes you away your power. When you can imagine this “thing” in front of you, and continue to focus on your own energy and power, the energy of the other “thing” transforms. When you observe things in your life as just energy, rather than the form, or your reaction to the form, or even your thoughts or judgments about them, you are in a place of being able to transform the unwanted energy. You can work with relationship issues, abundance issues, or anything that is taking your joy away by working with energy. We will be doing this in an amazing process at the Goddess Weekend in July. To sign up click here
The second process that I use that is so effective is the 4 Steps to Change. These four steps are important to learn and implement, because it allows you to take your power back and step into being that deliberate creator.
- RECOGNIZE: Identify what the situation is and how it takes you away from that joyful being that is your true nature. Describe the entire situation or circumstance that surrounds you feeling less than joyful. The minute you become aware and can recognize that you are out of the state of well-being, you have the power to change. Be real and honest so that you can clearly look at it, so you can change it. Not just this one time, but forever.
- ACKOWLEDGE: Part A: Who is responsible for creating this? Okay, if you have been working with the Law of Attraction and Deliberate Creation, I hope you said, “I did”. You create everything in your reality, wanted or unwanted, no exceptions. Instead of judging yourself and beating yourself up for this situation, which is never productive or useful, let’s figure out WHY so we can change it for the future. Part B: Why did you create this? What would you have to believe to create this type of situation in your life? Write out a list of ten reasons that you would have created this. Don’t censor it. Just allow your consciousness to flow from the pen onto the paper. Then go back and read each one and ask yourself, “Is this true? Does this resonate as truth to me.” You may have a few reasons why you would have created it. But now you are aware and you can do something to change it.
- FORGIVE: Instead of beating yourself up for the reason, or the limiting belief that you just discovered, forgive yourself. Truly love yourself enough to forgive so that you are bringing a different energy to yourself and to the situation. Forgiveness is so healing. Once you do this step then you can go onto the final step.
- CHANGE: How do you want to feel? What do you want to create? What do you want to believe? Then take a moment to step into the vibration of that new energy. If you want to feel powerful in your life, step into that feeling of being powerful. Even if you have to make it up, shift the energy so it feels better to you. This is where you can use different techniques and processes such as EFT. Remember everything in your outer reality is a direct reflection of your inner reality. If you want the outer to change, you need to shift from the inside. This means moving, shifting and changing your energy. From that change the energy of like frequencies will be attracted into your life.
You have the power to make these changes and to become neutral to the things that take you away from that power. Start with the small things that are not as energetically charged. Once you develop the skill with the smaller things then move onto the things that are a deeper issue for you, or have more of an energetic charge to them. This will help you have more confidence in your ability to shift the energy, and create your life the way you desire.
Your body is always communicating with you. Your body is your partner in this lifetime. It is always doing its job, whether we realize it or not. Many of us ignore what our body is telling us. If we start to pay attention to what our body is communicating to us, we will be able to release any resistance that we have in the body. We may have little pains in our shoulders, or we have headaches, or we have a chronic condition. Some of us might have female issues like PMS. All of these are resistance in the body. Instead of ignoring the messages, or trying to get rid of them with drugs or medication, pay attention to what it is try to tell you.
A few weeks ago I got a really bad cold, and I rarely get sick. The funny thing was that it first started in my throat and I completely lost my voice. Not a great thing for someone that coaches, teaches and trains using the telephone. I had to cancel my entire week of clients, and have someone else teach my classes. Instead of getting upset that I was sick, I listened to my body. Knowing that my body is always trying to help, protect or communicate with me, I started to listen.
I am not one to slow myself down. My friends call me a red Lamborghini, because I am always moving pretty fast and creating in my life. Well, I am pregnant and I needed to slow down and get some rest. I was not doing that even though I was really tired, so my body decided to do it for me. That week that I was forced to slow down, I realized that is exactly what I needed. I took naps and really cared for myself. I allowed myself to just be and not do. When I got the message from my body, I had a choice. I could have resisted it, or surrender to it. I surrendered.
This is exactly how you can heal your body from whatever disease or minor problem that you have. Listen to the pain or discomfort. Go into it and ask your body, “What are you trying to tell me?” Go in and feel the emotions that are connected with the resistance. Let them flow out of your body so you can bring in the feelings of well-being that is natural to you.
I have so many clients that come to me and say, “I have a headache.” Or “I have a pain in my lower back.” Or “My shoulder is killing me.” When they stop and listen to their bodies and what it is telling them, they can then address what the resistance is and heal it. If you are experiencing emotions, but you are not paying attention to them, they are they going to manifest in your body to get you to pay attention. The more you ignore them, the louder they will get.
People ask me, well if I go into the resistance and pay attention to what I don’t want, isn’t that going to create more? Because Law of Attraction, what you focus upon expands, it makes sense, right? Well, the Law of Attraction is always responding to your vibrational set point. If you have a set point of frustration and it has manifested inside your body as a small pain then that is the set point that you are attracting from. You need to pay attention to it, even for a short time, so that you can then release it. You don’t want to stay in the frustration, but you do want to pay attention long enough to get the message, release it, and then shift into a different vibration.
Working with the Law of Attraction does not mean that you should ignore or suppress what is really going on within you. When you are real and honest with what is happening within you, then you can release it and move on. We have all heard the saying “The truth shall set you free.” It is so true and so healing.
Our bodies naturally want to be in well-being. It actually takes a lot for us to be out of alignment and create problems in our physical bodies. Trust and listen to your body. It know what you need and how to return to absolute alignment.
For the Platinum Club this month I interviewed Jennifer McClean. I was amazed that our interview concluded with a great process to help you communicate with your body. I thought I would include it so you can learn to work with your body. It is another tool in your tool box. To access the interview click here. Enjoy.
This month I want to talk about compassion. It is really easy to judge someone or get mad at someone when they are critical, or harsh with you. This used to be my pattern. When someone was caustic or had a sharp tongue, I would react with anger. I would take it personally and then judge them. What I have realized is that every person, at the core of his/her being, is good and pure. But, most people have resistance or wounds that masks this pure positive being.
I was witnessing a family member recently that was hurting everyone around her. She was quick to call someone a name, or make a rude comment. Now these types of behaviors are not appropriate and it is up to us to stand in our power and call someone out on them. We can do that with love. The way you do that is by telling the person how you feel and when you feel that way, what happens to you? When you communicate how you feel about what someone just said or did, it is your feelings and if communicated from a loving place instead of a reactionary place, you are being true to yourself. For example, when this family member told another family member, “You can’t do anything right.” It was communicated, “That really hurt my feelings. When you said that it hurts me and I feel like pulling away from you. I feel belittled and why would I want to be with someone that belittles me?” The message was loud and clear and came from a loving place. It was also received and an apology followed right after.
So then what do you do with that after it is over? That is where compassion comes in. There is a reason that someone is treating another in that way. They are somehow unhappy in their own life. If you judge them it separates you. If you instead feel compassion for them, it is an expanding and loving energy. Which all of us practicing with the universal laws knows that love is the highest vibration in the universe.
Compassion for others will help them heal. It will soften your heart, and then soften the energy between you. Here is a great process to work with energy to transform into compassion and love:
This is to assist you in clearing some of the emotional energies that may make it more difficult for you to connect with your Divine Self.
This is to give you one way to release and let go of some of the attachments and desires that may be holding you back from expressing the power and the light that you are. This is an easy technique, one that you can use any time you have emotions
such as doubt, or fear, anxiety, pain, anger, irritation, disappointment, hurt. You can lift all of those easily and in a moment, transform them into love, peace, serenity, compassion, and forgiveness of yourself and others. As you transform these emotional energies into the energy of your heart, you can expand more easily in every area of your life, into all the higher dimensions of your self, and there will be no impediments, no filters between your highest self and your personality self. So this is also a technique of turning your personality self into a more transparent vessel so that you can better express the eternal, endless, and infinite light within you.
Call upon your soul right now to be with you. It has a consciousness of its own, and your soul is aware of you. As you do this, you are opening the channels of communication to your soul. You are building a bridge of light to your soul, so that your soul’s love, and will, wisdom and intelligence can pour forth into you.
Feel your soul’s love for you. It never judges you. It knows that you are always doing the best you can, and that there are no mistakes, only learning and growth.
Your soul is a beautiful being of light, and it is growing as you grow, for you are your soul as it appears in the three dimensional reality of the earth plane. Sense your heart center, perhaps like a flower with many petals and a radiant jewel in its center, in an area around your physical heart but on a subtle plane, your heart chakra. Imagine now that your soul is assisting you in awakening this heart chakra,
this heart center, even more. Your soul sends a tone, a note, you do not need to hear it, or you may, that begins to resonate with the jewel in the center of your heart, so that your heart center and the jewel in its middle begins to open even more. Until you are fully enlightened, some of the petals enclose the jewel in the middle and are not yet fully open. Picture your soul’s light beginning to stimulate that jewel,
and the jewel in the middle of your heart centers begins to become more active, responding to your soul, and begins to send out energy that unfolds some of the petals that have been closed.
Your heart center is becoming radiant with light and love, as if it is a miniature sun pulsating with energy, becoming more and more radiant, sending out rays of nurturing, warming light to all energies about you. Feel yourself growing more and more radiant, more open.
As you sense your heart center becoming radiant like a sun, imagine right below it in an area slightly above your navel is another center called your solar plexus center. This center is like a receiving station that picks up information about the energies that exist in the physical world around you. It registers thoughts and feelings coming from
other people, mass thoughts, and even energies in the animal and plant kingdom. You can transform your ability to stay calm and centered no matter what energy you are around by transforming and lifting solar plexus energy into your heart center. The
solar plexus center is the center of emotions, desires, attachments. You can transform situations and emotions and energies simply by lifting them from your solar plexus center into your heart center.
You might begin to practice by thinking of an emotion you have had today that you would like to transform. Imagine that this emotion is in your solar plexus center. Now imagine that this emotion is like a flame of bright light in your solar plexus center, and that it is beginning to reach upward into your heart center. Like a flame that disappears in the light of the sun, this emotion disappears in the light of your heart’s radiance.
You can do this in a quick moment whenever you find an emotional energy that you do not like. Lift it into your heart center and let it be absorbed in the radiance and light of your heart center.
Think of another area that you might feel pain or struggle. See this simply as energy, that it resides in your solar plexus center, that is waiting to be released and transformed into the higher vibration of your heart’s love. Let that small flame of energy that represents struggle in this area lift up into your heart, and be absorbed
into the sun of your heart.
Now think of a feeling you have had that stands in the way of loving yourself. Let that feeling come up from your solar plexus into your heart center to be dissolved in the radiance of your heart.
Think of something you have doubt about, or fear. Perhaps fear of change, fear of the unknown, whatever fear comes into your mind that might keep you from wanting to move forward and expressing your true power and your true Self. As it comes up, move that energy from your solar plexus center, where it originates, into your heart
center. Each thought, each feeling as it comes up, move it into your heart center.
If you are in a power struggle where you feel that you and another are relating to each other through the solar plexus center, feeling as if you need to transform this energy, let this connection that is in your solar plexus center be lifted to your heart center, into the energy of love.
Use this throughout the day as a simple way to transform the energies of the solar plexus center into the serenity of love, so that you can find that center of your being where the alignment occurs with every level, from your personality, to your soul, to your Divine Self.
As I mentioned in the first section of this newsletter, I was having a hard time connecting to my joy while I was in Arizona. It seemed as though everything in my reality was upsetting me. I was feeling hurt by my mom and my best friend. I was very down. This was puzzling to me, because here I was on vacation for three weeks in Arizona with my guys. I “should” have been so over the moon excited, but I was feeling sad instead.
I realized that what was happening with me was of my own doing. It was the Law of Reflection. Everything in your reality (your outer world) is a direct reflection of your inner world. In other words, your beliefs, thoughts and feelings all lead to the manifestation of your life experience. So I was witnessing all these situations that were upsetting me. I called my girlfriend, Rebecca, who is always such a great support system for me, and she asked me the questions that helped me get to what was the bottom line issue. I always say, “Even coaches need coaches when we are in our dark days.” She asked me, “What are the thoughts and beliefs behind these emotions?”
The bottom line for me was that I was feeling insignificant. It is easy for me to feel significant when I am helping someone change his or her life, or when I witness a client shift. But when I was on vacation, there was no work to channel my feeling of being significant. I had to change the belief that I was insignificant, and more importantly I had to give myself what I needed to feel significant.
What did I do? Whenever I felt a lower level state of being, or when I was witnessing what I did not want, I would stop and connect to my own feeling of significance. I told myself whatever I needed to say to allow myself to feel significant. I looked for evidence that I was important and valued through my husband, son, or other friends. And more importantly, I connected to the feelings of being important and valuable. I would connect to that feeling several times a day. Whatever you are trying to change within you, pick one energy such as the feelings of freedom, or abundance, or significance and vibrate there. Does matter what you call it, if the feeling is a high feeling, all good will flow to you.
I also started to do a process called the Ultimate Mirror Dialogue that I learned from my friend Barbara Rose, PhD. What you do is two times a day you look into your eyes in any mirror and tell yourself three good qualities derived from your observable actions that day. Here is my example: I observed my mothering to Alex. That action displayed the three good qualities of being loving, fun, and responsive. I then would look into my eyes and tell myself the outer action and the three qualities that I had within me that were displayed by doing that action. I would then feel so good about myself and I would feel expanded and joyful. Even if you did something that was not good, what good came out of it? For example, my mom was folding towels and I started to help her. Then Frederic started to help her and she said, “Oh I have such a wonderful son-in-law.” Not “Oh my daughter and son-in-law . . .” So I could have reacted from that feeling of insignificance, but instead I made a joke out of it. Later that day I looked in the mirror and observed how I reacted to my mom’s statement. I reacted with humor. The qualities that I observed were maturity, lightness, and a good sense of humor.
Why is this mirror dialogue effective? Two times a day you are telling yourself the complete truth that you can’t dispute in any way. Sometimes affirmations are great, but other times they don’t work, because they can be disputed. When you tell yourself that you were a great mother and that you showed qualities of being loving, fun and responsive, your mind can’t dispute what you say because it is an observable fact. If you typically believe things when you see it, which we all have that within us, this is a great process to use.
When you are becoming a deliberate creator, it is important to take responsibility for whatever is manifesting in your life. It would have been really easy for me to blame my mom or my friend for what they were doing. Blaming someone or something for what is in your reality is playing the victim, and is not coming from a place of empowerment. When I took responsibility for what was within me, based on what my outer world was showing me, I was able to shift and so did the situations and relationships. I had a great time with my mom and my best friend.
My sister-in-law had the same thing happen to her at work. She was feeling devalued with her boss. She started to think about all the great things that she does at work and all of her great qualities as an employee. She was working with shifting her own perception of her value. As she shifted, so did her outer reality. Her bosses gave her one of the highest honors with the company.
The Law of Reflection
The Law of Reflection is a very important law.
The Law of Reflection says that the traits you respond to in others, you recognize in yourself, both positive and negative.
Everything in the Universe is a mirror reflection of YOU. All relationships are a mirror reflection of the relationship with YOU. This includes your relationship with money as well as people in your life. If you have fear or insecurity about money, success, or anyone
in your life, then these are reflections of fear and insecurity within your own being. No matter how secure your partner attempts to make you feel, how much money or success you acquire, unless you change your inner feelings of insecurity, you will never feel secure.
Have you ever noticed this happens in relationships? The one partner is insecure, and no matter what the other partner says or does, the one partner is never secure and questions the love of the other.
This law can be demonstrated in four ways.
First:
That which you admire in others, you recognize as existing within yourself. When you notice wonderful qualities in another person, it is because you too have those qualities. When I look at Frederic and think about how truly amazing he is, it is an opportunity to recognize that I am just as amazing. I would not have been able to attract him into my life (by the Law of Attraction) if I was not as amazing.
EXERCISE: When you admire qualities in a person, what do you admire about them? Own that you too have those qualities! You wouldn’t be able to recognize them if you didn’t!
Second:
The Law of Reflection is demonstrated by that which you resist and react to strongly in others is sure to be found within you. I cover this in depth in my book, Perfect Pictures. Do you have those people in your life that push your buttons? No matter what they do, they seem to upset you in some way? A lot of us can relate to this with our parents. When you start to learn and apply the Law of Reflection, it is freeing. You realize when someone upsets you and you resist a quality that they possess, you can then turn back to yourself and realize that in order to change it outside of yourself, you need to change it within.
Third:
The third way that the Law of Reflection is expressed is that which you resist and react to in others is something which you are afraid exists within you. This is the scary part. When we observe this type of quality in another person and have an emotional reaction to it, we certainly don’t want to look at it. I know I used to hate it when my dad would express his anger. It wasn’t until I learned this law that I realized that I too had anger issues. But the good news was that once I became aware of it in myself, I was able to change it. Now when I get angry I have a healthy way of expressing it, instead of blowing
up and upsetting and alienating everyone around me. Because I applied the Law of Reflection in my own life, I can gain clarity and change what I am afraid of.
Fourth:
The Law of Reflection manifests in that which you resist in yourself, you will dislike in others. It is all about self-love. When you realize that you dislike a quality in another person, point the finger back to yourself and that is a great indication of where we need to develop self–love and self-acceptance.
The Law of Reflection is a great way to rise above the effect of fear. Those fears will always be reflected in your reactions to others. Once you recognize that everything is a mirror reflection of you and your inner world, you can recognize them and change them. As you let go of the fear, you automatically open yourself to express more unconditional love for yourself and others.
Our emotions are a gift from our higher self to let us know how we are feeling in each moment. It is our guidance system. How are you feeling? Remember feelings are the language of the Soul and the Soul always stands in its integrity. So how are you really feeling about yourself? Want a clue? What reflections of other people and other things are affecting you? When something irritates you about a person, situation, or circumstance, identify what is really irritating you. Now look deep inside yourself and identify that irritation inside of you.
Conversely, when you are with someone who makes you feel positive emotions, or you are happy doing an activity, or you see an object you really admire, look deep inside yourself to see what it mirrors to you that you like about yourself. The reflection that you have identified you cannot change in the other person or object. You must change
It if it irritates you, inside of you. If it pleases you, you must enhance it inside of you. You cannot change anyone else – only you. When you look in a mirror and your hair needs brushing, do you brush the hair on your head or the hair in the mirror? Everything is a reflection if you open your eyes to empowering yourself at Soul level. Look for the reflections and see what they teach you about you. By wanting to expand your consciousness and choosing to expand your spiritual growth, see the reflections as your continual growth opportunities – see these reflections as fascinating, exciting openings to become Who You Really Are as you strive to remember you are a part of Source.
The Truth and the Law
1. Your outer world of form and experience is a reflection of your inner world of thoughts and feelings. As above, so below. As within, so without. That is the Law.
2. The greater your awareness of the Presence of Spirit within you, the more that Presence fills your consciousness. That is the Law.
3. The deeper your understanding of Spirit as the Source, Substance and Activity of your supply, the more permanently that Truth will be etched in your consciousness. That is the Law.
4. It is your spiritual consciousness –your Knowledge of the Presence of God within you as total and complete fulfillment –that interprets itself as every form or experience in your world. That is the Law.
This month I want to take you through a process called, “allowing success.” This is a very powerful process that will help you expand into your success that you desire.
1. Picture something that you want that you don’t yet have.
It could money. It could be a relationship. It could be clients; whatever you want. It could be an ideal body. Really get a clear picture in your mind of what this thing is for you.
2. Think of all the reasons why you’re now closer to getting what you want than you’ve ever been.
Think about it-not the reasons why you want it-but why you’re now closer to getting what you want than you’ve ever been. For example, if you want to attract clients, why are you now closer than you’ve ever been? Is it because you’re clearer about the clients that you have? It’s not so much the reasons why you feel you deserve it, but why you’re getting closer than you’ve ever been. Write that down.
3. Take a moment and experience what success feels like to you.
Even if you have to close your eyes, what does success feel like in your physical body? Think about a time when you felt success. You might think of a past or even present success or imagine what a future success would feel like. Let it become as physical and as an emotional experience as you can. Let yourself physically feel the success. Let your emotions come up and allow yourself to emotionally feel that success. Breathe in that success for a few minutes; let yourself expand. Let yourself feel it and expand. Say maybe, from a place of one to ten, you’re maybe at a five. Allow yourself to expand to a seven, expand to an eight, so that you’re feeling success all throughout your physical body. Breathe in that success. Feel it at an even deeper level.
When you’re in this space, congratulate yourself on all things that you can think of that you’re doing well right now. It might be being a parent. It might be being a great friend. It might be attracting clients. It might be making money. Maybe you’re releasing weight; whatever it is for you. Maybe you’re working out. Maybe you’re creating a baby. Just congratulate yourself on all the things that you are doing well right now. And stick with and feel that success all throughout your body.
4. One way you can allow success is by telling your personal history in a way that emphasizes all the good experiences you’ve had.
Think about it. We’ve all had bad experiences and we’ve all had good experiences. Most people when they’re not really trained, and we all do it, too, we all tell our stories of how bad thing were, what happened. Instead of going into that space, tell how good things are.
We are taught as children not to boast. We taught not to be conceited. So we’re always looking for and pointing out all the bad things. It’s as if our society is so addicted to the drama of things and you hear people saying “oh, you think that’s bad, I have it so bad.” It’s really a different shift. It’s starting to look at all of the things you do in your life that are good experiences; that are wonderful experiences. Vacations that you’ve taken. Start looking for the good. As you’re doing this, expand the success in your physical body. You can play the following game alone or with a friend. Come up with as many answers in three minutes or less.
a. Tell your personal history or story as if you grew up with great abundance. Pick actual incidents, focusing only on times when you felt abundant, got what you wanted, or experienced your parents as abundant. You will be amazed at how many times you can remember when you did feel abundant.
b. Tell your personal history from the perspective of how you know you have always been divinely guided, as if you had a guardian angel. Think of two or three incidents to demonstrate this.
c. Tell your personal history from the perspective of how easily you have created things you wanted, perhaps remembering a time when you wanted something and it appeared quickly, without any effort on your part.
As you start doing this and you start really bringing in that feeling of success, consciously expand it even more, connecting with all the successes of the past and really expanding that success.
Check in with yourself right now and ask yourself how good you feel now that you’re focused on the areas of your past that actually work for you. Obviously, with the Law of Attraction, the more you focus on the abundance that you had in the past or that you have in the present, the more prosperity you’re going to attract in the future; the more success you’re going to have and experience in the future. All of our energy follows thought. So whatever you’re paying attention to it grows and increases. If you pay attention to your past successes, you’ll create a successful, positive future for yourself. Continue to allow that success to expand.
I have a very special gift for you this holiday season. I want to teach you about two Universal Laws that will make an enormous difference in your life. (Especially during this holiday season)
What are these laws?
The Law of Allowing and The Law of Giving
The Law of Allowing
The Law of Allowing is one of the most important laws, but usually the hardest for people to grasp. You may be working with the Law of Attraction, and Deliberate Creation, but if you do not master the Law of Allowing you will not have your desires realized. You will continue to struggle focusing on affirmations, meditations, and vision boards only to be left feeling more frustrated and confused. This is the law that will leave you saying, “Why does this stuff work for other people, but not me?”
Do you think that if someone with beliefs opposed to yours gets their way, you can’t have your way? Or do you believe there’s room for it all?
The truth is, there is freedom in allowing circumstances to be what they are and people to be who they are, whether you agree with them or not.
So, how in the world do you accept situations and people that stand for something you don’t? Or that want the opposite of what you want?
We tend to think we can’t have it both ways. So what do we do? We push back! We hold protest marches against war, we organize campaigns against drugs, we battle disease. And yet, understanding the Law of Attraction — that whatever you are focused on you attract more of — when you are focused on what you do not want in an effort to defeat it or resist it, you are not allowing what you do want to flow to you.
The Law of Allowing is about relaxing – having a relaxed, but positively focused mind – and allowing the universe to deliver to you what you’re wanting. When you say yes to something, you attract more of that into your life, because that is what you are focused on. When you say no to something, you attract more of that into your life, because that is what you are focused on. So in order to allow what you want to flow to you, you must allow others to focus on what they want – even if you don’t agree with it. When you understand these principles and put them to use consciously, intentionally and deliberately, you put yourself in a place of nonresistance.
How do you know if you’re allowing? By noticing how you feel.
Your emotions are always your guide. Whenever you are in a place of feeling good, you are in a place of allowing. Nothing is more important than that you feel good!
So what happens if someone is in your life is acting inappropriate? Does that mean you take the abuse, disrespect, and the negativity? NO! You are allowed to set your boundaries, and when someone is crossing them, you can say “No more”. This means trying not to change them, but respectfully telling them what is your truth.
We had a lady that we had to ask to leave the Goddess weekend, because she was inappropriate, disrespectful, and didn’t play well with others. We allowed her to be who she was, but after her attitude and behavior was so disruptive, we had to set our boundaries and ask her to leave. Having her there, did not feel good. Asking her to leave did not feel good. But after she left, it felt amazing.
She is allowed to be herself. We did not try to change her. But we respectfully ask that she be herself somewhere else.
The Law of Giving
Why is The Law of Giving important? This is a law that most people forget about. This is a key in creating abundance. To give is to receive. Giving and receiving are the two opposite seats on the see-saw of life. Every relationship is one of give and take. Everything in the Universe is energy. Energy is continually being exchanged in the Universe as it flows from gas to liquid to solid, from solid to liquid to gas. The circulation, the flow of energy means that something or someone is always giving energy one moment in one form and receiving energy the next moment in another form. It is when you give that you also receive. The intention behind the giving, if it is to create happiness for the receiver and the giver, will ensure it generates increase. Happiness is expansive because it supports life and sustains life. It adds to, or increases, life. The giver also benefits from this expansiveness, this increase in life. The Law of Giving says if you want to receive something first give it to others. The best way to get what you want is to help others get what they want. Giving and receiving, with the correct intention, allows the flow of energies in the Universe to provide for the Giver and for the Receiver. For as long as you give you will be receiving.
Giving is an esoteric science that never fails to produce results if it is done with love and joy, because the Law will shower you with ten-fold return.
Go here to listen to the teleseminar that I did on these two laws.
Every once and awhile I will receive a crazy email from someone that wants to show me “THE” way. They came across my website and see that I talk about the universal laws, but they are concerned about my soul after I die. They feel that I am materialistic, because I enjoy things like having my ideal partner, my ideal body, abundance, taking nice vacations, and so on.
Those are typically the type of people that are so unhappy and they search for something that will help them. They see what someone else has and then they get upset because they don’t have it. Instead of being inspired by someone else, they feel the need to tell them how they are living their life wrong.
I thought this was great to bring up, because this is the exact opposite of the Law of Allowing. Someone was so upset because of my way of life (good, bad, or indifferent), that they had to write me a VERY long and descriptive email about where I am going to go when I die because I, oh let me quote it: “Our sin nature that we inherited from Adam and Eve leads us to live just for here and now and mainly for self. (Which is all your program is about, get more for me, a husband, a fancy car, a dream home etc.)”
I had to laugh when I received this, because I am living my wonderful life and it is because I have wonderful souls in my life, I have deep meaning by what I teach (I get to help people improve their lives and feel a deeper connection every day), I have such an amazing connection to God/Goddess/All that is and all the other stuff is attracted to me because of the high vibration of love and appreciation that I hold.
This person (and so many others that don’t know) don’t understand, or are afraid of the Universal Laws, make judgments. What does judging another do? It lowers your vibration!
One of my husband’s friends at Alex’s Christening told me that I was a pagan because I believed in the Universal laws. Seriously? You are at a Christening for my son and your belief is that because I follow and believe in the Universal laws that I am going to hell? Again . . . I had to laugh.
It all is funny to me, because I can see that they are scared. They are in total fear because it is something they can’t understand. So what do they do? They judge and ridicule someone else’s ways. Again, going against the Law of Allowing!
There are three ways that the Law of Allowing works:
- How you relate to the Universe.
- How you relate with others.
- How you relate to yourself.
As far as relationships, when you’re around someone do you think that if someone has beliefs that are opposed to yours that you have to make them see the light and try to change them?
If someone you’re around has a different belief then you have do you feel that you need to change their opinion or their belief or do you simply allow them to feel the way they feel and give yourself permission to feel the way you feel? Do you accept situations and people that stand for something that you don’t? Or, do you want the opposite to happen? Do you basically try and change people’s opinions and try to control, and basically judge people who don’t think the way you think?
That is truly the Law of Allowing as it relates to being in relationships. We think that we have to have it both ways. We think that everybody has to think the way we think or believe the way we believe so we push back on people if they don’t think the way we think. That is resistance!
I know I used to push back on and try to change my parents, or push back on circumstances I didn’t like. What is wrong with this is I was completely focused on what was wrong in my life and what I needed to change in my life instead of accepting and allowing it to be there.
Understanding the Law of Attraction whatever you’re focused upon you attract more of, when you’re focused on what you don’t want in order to defeat it or resist it you’re not allowing what you do want to flow to you. I hope I am making sense and you’re kind of getting it as far as how it relates to people.
When you’re trying to make your partner think a certain way or be a certain way you’re focused on the “bad qualities” or the way you want them to be instead of being focused on the positive qualities of that person and really drawing out the positive qualities in the person. You’re focused on the wrong thing. You’re focused on what you don’t want, what you don’t like instead of being focused on what you really do like about that person.
When that happens you’re out of alignment with the Law of Allowing. If you’re out of alignment with the Law of Allowing you believe that another person needs to think, feel, believe and act according to how you think they should. I call this having perfect pictures. That is what my book Perfect Pictures explains.
This can cause a lot of suffering in your life and in your relationships. This is literally the opposite of accepting another person as they are. It is based on this. If you have a deep rooted fear that unless everyone thinks, feels, believes and acts in a certain way basically your way that they are somehow wrong, you then judge them. In that judging you are in a lower level emotion. You’re in a lower level vibration and based on the Law of Attraction you will attract more negative people, circumstances, and situations to you.
When you’re in a relationship with someone whether it is a coworker, a significant relationship, a relationship with your kids when you’re judging them and wanting them to be the way you think you want them to be instead of accepting them for who you are you’re in a low vibration and that is what you’re going to get back to you.
You will attract more negative people, situations, circumstances and things to you. If you need to make everyone conform in order to make you feel good about yourself and your world you truly will never experience freedom. This is like the exact opposite of freedom. This is bondage and you can never get the rest of the entire world to behave the way you think they should.
This is why so many arguments start. This is why wars start. It is just because we don’t allow people to believe what they believe. Literally the Law of Allowing is about relaxing, having a relaxed a positively focused mind and allowing the universe to deliver to you what you’re wanting.
It is like with anything when you say yes to something you attract more of that into your life because that is what you’re focused on based on the Law of Attraction. Again, when you noted something and you’re resisting something you attract more of that into your life because this is what you’re focused on.
In order to allow what you want to flow to you, you must allow others to focus on what they want even if you don’t agree with it. When you understand these principles and put them into use consciously, intentionally and deliberately you put yourself in a place of non-resistance.
In the example of receiving this email where this man was trying to “enlighten” me on “THE” way to be, I laughed and silently blessed this man in hopes that he can find his happiness. I quickly moved about my day thanking the Universe for all the amazing blessings in my life.
I thought it was a good time to bring up this subject of the Law of Allowing, because the holidays are coming and your holiday season will be so much better when you are in the space of allowing.
I wish you a wonderful holiday season!
I just shot this quick video for you and you need to see it now (click below to watch):
Here’s why this is important to you:
1. I re-connect you with the four principles of the Goddess (think about when you are happy in an area of your life–I’m sure these three pieces played a role).
2. I’m giving you a really cool new goodie and the video explains it 
Imagine and Enjoy
Goals are different than dreams. Dreams are a vision for what you want in your life. Do you have a vision for each area of your life?
Download this master dream list for your life here:
Making a goal is very important in trying to create what you want in your life. Just thinking about the goal or the outcome is not enough. Many experts such as Tony Robbins, Terry Cole-Whittaker, Deepak Chopra, and many others have written about the power of writing down our goals. All of these great authors have taken the same universal principles and laws and put it into a format that has worked for them. I have summarized their teachings and what has been helpful for me in achieving my goals and dreams.
First, visualize that on one end of the spectrum you have a goal, and on the other you have reality or where you sit currently. For example, if you have a goal to be a size 4, and currently you are a size 8, that is your spectrum. This is an example and a goal I had in my life. Where I have this example, replace your own goals and dreams to understand the process of achieving goals and manifesting your dreams. We all have the power to create our own lives and our own dreams. No two lives are the same, neither are the goals.
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GOAL |
CURRENT REALITY |
There are steps that need to be taken to achieve your desired goal. Visualization is a very powerful technique that helps manifest dreams into reality, but visualization alone will not make your body transform. Tony Robbins gives the example that if you want to be successful, and just “bliss out”, that is just sit in meditation and visualize, and do not take action, someone is going to come and take your couch. Visualization and meditation are important steps in manifesting, because it gets you in touch with that creative being that is in each of us. This is the law of pure potentiality. It allows us to become aware of the unlimited potential that we have, and what we are capable of creating.
When you visualize something you want in your life as if you already have it, your subconscious cannot tell the difference between something you imagine and something you actually experience. That is why it is important to only focus on positive experiences in life. This is why a repeated thought pattern of fear can manifest in your experience.
Back to our spectrum example, you desire to be a size 4 or be financially free, but where you stand today is a size 8 or $20,000 in debt. You have to do the following steps.
First, get in alignment with your inner being. Your inner being will know the actions steps to take towards your goal.
Second, after you are in alignment, write out 6 things that you will do the following day to move towards your goal. Charles Schwab did this exercise to build his multi million-dollar business. Every night before he would go to bed, he would write out the 6 most important things to do to move towards his goal. He would do those 6 things first. If he did not complete all 6, he would then take the remaining actions and put them to the next day. So if one day he only accomplished 4, he would then take the remaining 2 and make that a priority for the next day.
Next, ask
yourself these four important questions:
What are the steps that I need to take to achieve my goal?
Why do I want to achieve this goal?
What needs to be released?
What do I need to let go of that is no longer working for me?
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GOAL |
CURRENT REALITY |
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STEPS: |
Sign up for a gym |
Taking the action is the most important part of the goal. You need to move toward the goal and get started. The steps are what it will take to succeed. Without the steps you have a goal that most likely will not be achieved. What will motivate you to take the steps? Your “Why”
The second question, “Why do I want to achieve this goal?” This “Why” will fuel your determination. If you get a big enough “Why” you will be driven to succeed. You need to have a “Why”. Another way of thinking of your “Why” is, what feelings will achieving these goals give you? The feeling or the Why needs to be your focus. That is what will propel you in taking the steps to achieving your goals. Discipline sounds good, but it is not a driving force to move a person to action. Also, your Why will get you into the feeling place and that is when the Law of Attraction goes into action and sends you what you are vibrating.
For example:
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Why: |
I want to feel sexy. |
Once you become really clear about what is going to keep you determined, and why you are motivated to move towards the goal, you need to ask the third question. “What do I need to release?” Think of the spectrum of where the goal is and where you are currently, as a road. Put in even more simple terms, point A to point B. What is in the road that will disguise itself as roadblocks?
This could be other people, it could be your own limiting thoughts, it could be fears, or it could be your own beliefs. Maybe you have a belief that you couldn’t possibly ever be a size 4, or maybe you feel you don’t deserve to be. It is time to get really clear about what has stopped you in the past, and what has potential from stopping you now. If you become conscious of the roadblocks, and have clarity that they are there, you can release or avoid them.
Example:
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Roadblocks: |
Eating junk food. |
I have provided an activity sheet for you to write out your goals and all the steps to achieve them. I guarantee that if you follow this formula you will achieve your goals.
What are the steps again?
What are the steps again?
1. Write out your goal (I will give you guidance as to how to write out the goals)
2. Get in alignment
3. Determine what are the 6 steps you will take today to move towards that goal. It could be making a phone call, emailing someone, or creating something.
4. Take those steps first thing as a priority each day. Do those before you do anything else.
5. Ask yourself the four important questions outlined above and on this activity sheet.
Goal Setting Tips
The following broad guidelines will help you to set effective goals:
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SMART Goals:
A useful way of making goals more powerful is to use the SMART mnemonic. While there are plenty of variants, SMART usually stands for:
For example, instead of having “to lose 20 pounds” as a goal, it is more powerful to say “To have achieved my ideal weight of 115 pounds by December 31, 2010.” Obviously, this will only be attainable if you have taken the necessary steps in achieving this goal.
Achieving Goals
When you have achieved a goal, take the time to enjoy the satisfaction of having done so. Absorb the implications of the goal achievement, and observe the progress you have made towards other goals. If the goal was a significant one, reward yourself appropriately.
All of this helps you build the self-confidence you deserve.
With the experience of having achieved this goal, review the rest of your goal plans:
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You are not a separated personality; you have a team, or energy you can call on any time you need. You have unlimited power when you are in this space – power to send away energies that are bothering you, power to clear old things, power to build the new.
When you are becoming a deliberate creator, there are certain steps to take when attracting what you desire. The first few steps are about preparation, and moving into a different energy vibration. You will create what you have always created unless you get to a new level of light. There is a saying, “If you do what you have always done, you are going to get what you have always had”. This is also similar to the definition of insanity. The definition of insanity is “doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”.
Think about this definition for a second and ask yourself, does this definition apply to the way you are applying the Law of Attraction?
You need to move to a higher level of illumination or vibration in order to change what you have in your life. There are many ways to do this, but the quickest way I have found is to meditate and work with your higher energies that are always available to you.
The next step is to identify who you are as your Divine Self, with the power, will, wisdom, love, illumination, and inspiration, rather than the personality self that feels sometimes helpless and up against all these forces. In order to get to the next level in you life you will want to shift the identification in how you manifest from your personality self to your Divine Self. Another way of saying this is, you need to connect and identify with the powerful being that you are. Much of the work in the Goddess weekend will be focused on that.
The third step is alignment. Imagine that you are building a bridge of light to your Divine Self and bringing back with you some of the qualities that open that connection to the Self more and more on a daily basis. What can you bring into your life on a daily basis that will allow you to get in touch with the Divine Self?
We are all humans and each one of us has those days where we are swept away by life and there are different ways our attention gets diverted. It is us that have to make this spiritual connection a priority. We are the one’s that have to schedule or set aside time to put ourselves in a space of alignment by meditation, coaching, reading or whatever else connects you. It really is what vibration you are sending out on a daily basis that determines the richness of your life.
An analogy that has been used often is that we send our consciousness like a spider that wants to get somewhere, it sends out their web, and then crawls across it. You might think of the Divine Self shining down upon us. It is reaching down, wanting to pull us in, wanting to get our attention, but we must build the bridge from our end. We must reach up and send that light upward, so that the higher and lower can meet.
Once you are in that connection with your higher or Divine Self, it is important to prioritize your creations. In many of the esoteric books they say that part of the problem with humanity and the problem that has created disease and congestion, is all the incomplete thoughts and directions; how scattered people are. You may have ten different things you want to manifest. If you want to manifest something you are going to have to focus on it and make it your intention, and stay with it over time. One of the greatest detriments to manifesting is scattered energy. We all know the pull of this, and the pull of that. In each moment, where are we being pulled to, where are we directing our energy?
It is important to get really clear on what you want to create and focus your intention on those things. I am guilty of wanting to create ten different things at a time. I have noticed that when I have too many creations out there, it takes each one of them longer to manifest and I start to question my power to create. I have learned over the years to pick a few things at a time and prioritize what is the most important thing for me and to maintain my focus and intention on those things. They manifest quick and it helps my belief in the Law of Attraction and my own ability to create.
As you connect with the Divine Self, and as you work in this way, you can really shorten the time. You can have your manifestations set up much more quickly. The more we learn to manifest from our Divine Self, the quicker the appearance of the form, and the more precise the form.
I was reflecting on what is the difference when I manifest from my personality versus from my Divine Self. I manifest in a much quicker and elegant way. I realized even in small things, what I create is so much more magnificent, even in the act of buying a car, or attracting something simple.
I wanted to purchase a different car, because getting Alex in and out of my convertible was not in ease and effortlessness. It was killing my back and was getting grumpy every time I had to run an errand. I was unable to put the stroller in my car, so I had to carry him around in the car seat everywhere I went. I told Frederic what I desired. We went to the dealership and the exact car I wanted was available. The dealership had a SUV that was a representative’s car so I was able to purchase the automobile with low mileage and pay less than if it was new.
You can manifest this way (divine manifesting) and everything you do will bring a blessing. From the people you meet, the amazing coincidences, the connections, and the people you will help that in return help you. There will be a momentum that you build as you create something; it just leads to the next thing. There is a building momentum of success with manifesting when you create in this way. You will find that the creation itself – what you want to manifest–will begin to give you energy. First it is going to take your energy, but as you begin to build it, a lot of energy is going to come back to you. It is going to be a source of energy, and you are going to have a relationship to that creation.
We are here to manifest. I mean that is what spirit wants to do here, is to create form. We love our creations. We like to think about them. We get excited when we think of them. Manifesting is dear to our hearts. We were born to manifest. I think it is part of our major purpose here on earth, is to create. Why are we here to create? I think one of the answers is, “Because we love our creations”.
Send love to those things that you want to manifest. Feel as if they have already manifested. Connect with the essence of what it feels like to already having it in your life. Vibrate from a space of fulfillment. And enjoy the process of bringing it into your life.
Happy manifesting
You may notice that a lot of my examples happen to be around being a new mom lately. This is my world right now, and I am applying the universal laws to this area of my life as well. Every situation that you have in your life you can apply the universal laws and see quick results. No exceptions.
When Alex was first born everyone wanted to give me “advice” on how to handle a baby. Where I appreciated that, everyone’s “advice” contradicted each other. I would have one person tell me, “Never give a baby water.” And then the next person would say, “You should give him some water.” Then I would have someone tell me, “Don’t give the baby a bottle, because he will get nipple confusion.” And someone else would tell me, “You should give the baby the bottle so that you can have a little bit of independence.” Or “Don’t give the baby a pacifier.” And then I would hear “Give the baby a pacifier, it will soothe him.”
I WAS SO FRUSTRATED!
I finally got so frustrated that I didn’t want to listen to anyone. Frederic and I agreed that we are the parents and we will do what we think is right for our baby. That instantly changed the whole parenting experience for the both of us.
When we listened to our baby and connected with our own inner guidance and wisdom of what we should do to soothe Alex, everything was easy and they were the right actions to take.
There are so many opinions of what is right and wrong. There are so many people that want to tell you how to do something. The only way you will know if something is right for you is to listen to your own inner guidance. How do you know you are in alignment with your own inner guidance? You feel good.
As Dr. Wayne Dyer has said (and I paraphrase) “To feel good is to feel God. Good and God are interchangeable.”
When you are feeling good about a decision, that is the right decision for you. When you feel good about an action to take, that is the right action for you.
We need to get back to trusting ourselves, and the connection that we have with our inner being. How do we build trust? We practice. Like with anything the more you do something, the more confidence you have in your ability. The more you practice listening to your intuition the better you will be at recognizing it and the more you will trust it.
How do you get in touch with that inner guidance? There are many ways. I find that meditation helps me connect instantaneously. Just find a space of silence and intend to connect will do wonders.
Coaching with a Law of Attraction coach will help remind you of your greatness and this connection. You can do this for free with one of the QSCA coaches (See the upcoming events section to sign up). I train my coaches to NEVER give advice. Each person has within them the ability to find their own answers because of this inner guidance. They are trained to help you connect with yours.
Spend some time in nature. Nature has a very healing effect on the mind, body and spirit. Just watching the leaves blow in the wind, or waves crashing on a beach can be a spiritual experience.
Also, when you hear a voice inside your own mind give you a direction to go in, listen to it. For example, if you hear that inner voice tell you to charge your cell phone, charge it. If it tells you to take a different road home, take it. There have been so many times when I heard this voice and didn’t do what it said and I regretted it later. Once it told me to charge my phone and I didn’t listen, later that day I received an important phone call and I did not have enough batteries. The call cut off and I lost out on an opportunity. I started to listen and each and every time I hear that voice (no matter how strange it may sound) I do what it says. It always works out in my favor. That is how you build trust.
What is trust? Trust is opening your heart, believing in yourself and in the abundance of the universe. It is knowing that the universe is loving, friendly, and supports your higher good. Trust is knowing that you are part of the process of creating, and believing in your ability to draw to you want to want.
What does trust mean? To Rely Upon Spirit Totally
Go within and connect with your Infinite Wisdom. Ask your inner guidance for direction in your life. Follow that guidance as long as it feels good to you. Believe that everything will work out the way you want it to. What you believe will ultimately turn into your reality. If you believe that the universe is always supporting you then that is what you will experience. If however, you believe that the world is against you, you will also experience that.
Only you and your inner guidance know what is right for you. When you are in alignment with this inner guidance you are in a pure positive state. By the Law of Attraction positive life experiences will then be reflected back to you.
A Friend of mine sent this to me over email and I thought it was funny and appropriate for this newsletter.
Here is something to think about when negative people are doing their best to rain on your parade. Remember this story the next time someone who knows nothing (and cares less) tries to make your life miserable…
A woman was at her hairdresser’s getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome with her husband. She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded: “Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It’s crowded and dirty. You’re crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?”
“We’re taking Continental,” was the reply. “We got a great rate!”
“Continental?” exclaimed the hairdresser.” That’s a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they’re always late. So, where are you staying in Rome?”
“We’ll be at this exclusive little place over on Rome’s Tiber River called Teste.”
“Don’t go any further. I know that place. Everybody thinks its gonna be something special and exclusive, but it’s really a dump.”
“We’re going to go to see the Vatican and maybe get to see the Pope.”
“That’s rich,” laughed the hairdresser. You and a million other people trying to see him. He’ll look the size of an ant. Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours. You’re going to need it.”
A month later, the woman again came in for a hairdo. The hairdresser asked her about her trip to Rome.
“It was wonderful,” explained the woman, “not only were we on time in one of Continental’s brand new planes, but it was overbooked, and they bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a handsome 28-year-old steward who waited on me hand and foot.
And the hotel was great! They’d just finished a $5 million remodeling job, and now it’s a jewel, the finest hotel in the city.
They, too, were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us their owner’s suite at no extra charge!”
“Well,” muttered the hairdresser, “that’s all well and good, but I know you didn’t get to see the Pope.”
“Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and explained that the Pope likes to meet some of the visitors, and if I’d be so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the Pope would personally greet me. Sure enough, five minutes later, the Pope walked through the door and shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me.”
“Oh, really! What’d he say?”
He said: “Who messed up your hair?”
Ah, the Law of Allowing. Most people find this law the hardest to work with and understand. It is also the most important law in order to create what you want.
You are working with the Law of Allowing when you experience no resistance, or lower level emotions.
|
Fear |
Doubt |
Anger |
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Resentment |
Jealousy |
Powerlessness |
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Self-pity |
Boredom |
Disappointment |
I believe that all emotions are important and are there to teach us something. Where most people get into trouble is where they suppress their emotions and they get used to vibrating in that negative place. Emotions are there to communicate with us. They are there to be felt and then released. Emotions are energy in motion. When they are not released, they become resistance and then you find yourself out of alignment with your Source. You are not in a space of allowing.
Why is it important to be in a space of allowing and work with the Law of Allowing?
The application of the Law of Allowing will bring absolute freedom in your life. You will feel free in your relationships to be who you are. You will feel free in your career to do what you want. And you will feel free in your life to create whatever you desire.
There are three ways to apply this law. First, is the relationship that you have with you. Are you in alignment with how God/Goddess/All-that-is feels about you? This Source always thinks that you are perfect, whole and complete just as you are. This Source loves and adores you completely no matter how much you accomplish, what you wear, how much money you make, or what you look like. If you are thinking thoughts about yourself that are not in alignment with those higher thoughts, you are in resistance and working against the Law of Allowing.
What thoughts do you have about you?
The second way to apply this law is how you relate to others in your life. This does not matter if it is your husband, wife, kids, co-workers, boss, clients, in-laws, or your next-door neighbor. God/Goddess/All-that-is not only thinks you are perfect, whole and complete, but this Source also holds that vision for all the people that you love and all the people that annoy you. When your thoughts about other people in your life are not in alignment with the thoughts of Source, there is resistance and you are not working with The Law of Allowing.
What thoughts do you have about the people around you?
Finally, the last way to apply this law is the way you receive from the Universe to deliver to you what you want. When you are pushing and forcing something to happen, you are not in allowing and the Universe can’t flow to you what you want.
Do you trust the universe?
I experienced this at a deep level during my birthing experience. If you have or have not given birth, or if you are a man, this story will still show you how I was struggling and not applying the Law of Allowing, which led to a lot of pain for me. Even though I really enjoyed my whole pregnancy experience, I was so “done” being pregnant. I was determined that Alexander was coming early. I was so determined that I actually had false labor that sent me to the hospital. I spent an entire night in the hospital having contractions, but not dilating any more then when I first arrived.
I would hear all the women going through labor and I became so frightened. The little contractions that I was feeling were painful, but I clearly wasn’t experiencing what the women that were giving birth were feeling. These women sounded like they were being beaten. As each woman came and went I became more and more terrified and I became more and more resistant. I even asked my doctor if she could just give me a C-section, because I did not want to experience what the other women were experiencing. I was trying to make this happen, like running a business. I thought, “I am already here in the hospital and this is happening!” (Alexander and Source had a different plan, which I was resisting).
When I was discharged from the hospital, I went home and I was completely convinced that I could not do this. I was so fearful and scared that my entire body was constricting. This is a good indication if you are in resistance or not.
Do you feel expanded or constricted?
When you find yourself feeling lower level emotions, ask yourself that question.
I realized that I was constricted and that I was not in my feminine Goddess space. I was in my masculine, “make things happen” mode. I couldn’t force this to happen. I couldn’t make this happen. It was not up to me to decide when and how this would happen. I had to surrender to God/Goddess/All-that-is and allow. It is when I finally relaxed and got into my feminine space and trusted that all things would be fine, my water broke and I actually went into labor.
The nurses would even tell me this, “You need to relax and allow, because if you tense up, your body won’t open up. It will take you longer to get to where you want to go.” This is true for all aspects of working with the Law of Allowing.
When you are not in an allowing space with yourself, you feel negative emotions. When you are not in an allowing space with others, you feel negative emotions. When you are not in an allowing space with the universe, you feel negative emotions.
Practice getting into an allowing space by dropping your resistance. Think of yourself as a pipe. The top of your head is the opening of the pipe and your source can flow all beautiful and high vibrational energy through you. Joy, abundance, creativity, and harmony flow and you feel connected. Think of the resistance in your body as things that clog up the pipe. The energy from your source can’t flow freely when your pipe clogged up. The result is disconnection from your source and this flow, and it can result in fear, resentment, anger, doubt, and frustration.
Open up to the free flowing energy that Source makes available to you. It is time to unclog your pipe and allow that energy to flow. That is allowing at its best.
Christy talks about working consistently with the Laws and the importance of coaching.
I wanted to share a VERY personal story to illustrate how important being real and honest with our emotions is to our overall health and well-being.
I was in my eighth month of pregnancy and the entire time I felt amazing. I did not have any of the typical symptoms that most women have with pregnancies. This was not because I am lucky or a coincidence. I worked through a lot of my “issues” and fears about being a mom, stepped into my feminine creative space and decided to create the experience the way I wanted it to be (You will learn this at the Goddess weekend).
All of a sudden I started to feel horrible. The left side of my head was killing me and no matter what I did-the pain persisted. I also started to have my sciatic nerve on the left side of my body start to really hurt. I know after doing this work for over a decade, that any pain in the body is resistance in the mind. I also knew that the left side of the body represents the feminine and the right side represents the masculine. Was it a coincidence that just my left side hurt? No. There are no coincidences.
I also know that I am an amazing creator, and typically don’t do pain in my body. Seeing me go through this was hard on Frederic. I knew it was draining him and was not fun for him to be around me. I was also noticing that I was snapping at him, which I never do.
I had many fears that were coming up around him and not being happy, which logically does not make sense because we are so in love and happy together. These negative thoughts and fears that I had felt caused a whole cycle of negative things to happen. My feeling sorry for myself was draining him. I could feel him pulling away, which was leading to more fears about our relationship. So I need to stop this pain and step back into my empowered Goddess space.
I went through the 4 steps to change. These steps can be used to change any emotion, creation, or situation.
1. Recognize: I am feeling pain in my head and my left sciatic nerve in making a pain in my butt. It is on the left side of my body, which represents the Goddess/Feminine side. So physically I am not feeling well. I am also just getting over a cold.
Emotionally and mentally I have been feeling down. I am not looking like myself because of the pregnancy, so I don’t’ feel good about myself whenever I look in the mirror. I don’t see me. I see an over inflated me and I don’t feel she is very beautiful. I don’t even recognize the person that I am looking at. This brings up fear in me about Frederic, which I know is all coming from me. I feel like he is bored and tired of my condition. I don’t feel he is attracted to me because of the way I look and my fear is that he will stop loving me. (This was all my stuff) I even voiced this to him this weekend and he assured me that he is very much attracted to me, that I am pregnant and he loves me, and that if he is bored or unhappy then it is his problem and up to him to change. (God love him!) So I am creating this drama and fear for nothing. It is not about him, it is about me.
(Recognize: What do you have in your experience? What is the situation or circumstance that you are unhappy with? What are you feeling? Recognize those emotions are of a low vibration)
2. Acknowledge: Who is creating this? ME (We are always creating everything in our reality. When you can take responsibility for this, you can then have the power to change any situation)
Why am I creating this: It is all my reality and my outer is a reflection of my inner. So why am I creating this?
First, I am upset and angry (this was new to me). When I look in the mirror and that person that I knew isn’t there anymore, I get mad. Nothing has changed for Frederic since this pregnancy. He gets to still go golf and play poker. He still looks the same. His body didn’t change. His skin did not change. He is exactly who he was and will continue to be. He doesn’t have to lose a bunch of weight after the baby is born. For the first time, I can admit, this is pissing me off! Why does the woman have to do all the work in creating a baby? (Keep in mind my whole experience up to this point was magical. I was honored to be the one carrying the baby and feeling Alex grow and move. I loved being one with him.) No matter how much I loved this experience, there was a place in me that was feeling angry and resentful. I thought, I can continue to look at that in this perspective, or I can look at the wonderful things that the woman gets to experience. But there are emotions that I am feeling and I need to be honest and real and express them so they are no longer in my body causing me pain.
Second, I am feeling sorry for myself, and when I do, I get Frederic’s attention. He touches me and massages me to make me feel better. The thing is that Frederic already does these things for me, so I don’t have to be in total pain and create this drama to receive his love and attention. He always gives me that. The end result is that it is draining him and I think it is a way for me to punish him for the anger and resentment I am feeling. So I am pissed off at him. I am pissed off at God for creating it this way, and I am pissed at myself. I did my anger exercise to release the anger at Frederic, God and myself.
3. Forgiveness: I forgave Frederic and that it is not his fault. I know he will help me and be an amazing partner. It is not his fault that he doesn’t have to create the baby. As a matter of fact, I am the one that gets to bond before Alex even comes, so it is a privilege for me. I forgive Frederic. (I said this over and over until I felt it within my body). I also forgive God for creating it to be like this for the woman. I actually now feel grateful that I get to experience this because I am the one that gets the instant bond with him. I forgive the Goddess for not creating this different as well, and again I feel grateful for the experience. Finally, I forgive myself for needing to manipulate Frederic to get his love and attention. I forgive myself for leaving my Goddess space and for feeling totally powerless. I forgive myself for not catching this earlier so I didn’t have to drag on and continue to cause me so much pain and discomfort. I forgive myself for feeling angry and resentful at Frederic. I forgive myself for using self-pity to numb my emotions so I didn’t have to look at and address the anger and resentment I was feeling.
4. Change: I am deciding right now to embrace this situation and accept that it is the woman’s life that changes during pregnancy, including her body. I know I will have an even better body after the baby is born. I step into my empowerment and know that I am creating a miracle. Men don’t get to do this, only women. I have been chosen for this amazing being, and I am honored. I embrace my Goddess, my empowerment, and my body the way it is today. I return back to loving and accepting myself as I am in this moment. I love and accept my body for what it is creating. I step fully back into my power and feel my own worth and value, knowing that I am worthy of Frederic’s love. I know what we share, how much he loves and adores me, and how wonderful our lives are together. I know how bringing Alex into our lives is just going to bring more love and joy into this family (and it has). That is all I need to focus on as it relates to him and our relationship. I am now feeling empowered and connected back to my Goddess self, and amazingly enough . . . my headache that I had for weeks and was getting worse each day, is TOTALLY GONE!
It never came back after that moment, because I released the negative emotions that was causing the resistance and led to the pain. My sciatic nerve also let go and I was pain free for the rest of my pregnancy.
This story is about my experience, but no matter who you are, you can use these four steps to change for anything that you want to change in your life. Be real and honest with yourself and your feelings. They are your emotional set point and the vibration you are created from.
“Any time you have physical discomfort of any kind, whether you call it emotional, or physical pain within your body, it always, always means the same thing: “I have a desire that is summoning Energy, but I have a belief that is not allowing so I’ve created resistance in my body.” The solution, every single time, to the releasing of discomfort or pain — is the relaxation and the reaching for the feeling of relief.”
Excerpted from the workshop in Kansas City, MO on Sunday, August 29th, 1999 Our Love, Jerry and Esther
Christy tells how to “Get into the flow” and the importance of being flexible.
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